Perfectionism Hurts.

Today I have felt the pain of perfectionism and seen the light of another way.  I have been making my sister a birthday present and there's a part of it that's not perfect, not exactly as it should be.  And the more I made myself change it, correct it, find a way of making it perfect, the more frustration I felt, the more stupid I felt. This then turned to inadequacy.  And I had a cry. 

And then I remembered what I had done.  What a beautiful gift I had made her, and how the imperfection is a rich and beautiful part of the creation.  I then saw the imperfection in me, my body, my home, my life, my circumstances and got a little closer to it, a little more observant of it and I felt the warmth of acceptance coming over me, where there was a possibility for me to feel the meaning in things rather than the assessment of things. 

Assessment seems always to lead down the same path, to inadequacy, fearful thinking and in my case tears and pain.  And I've had enough of it.  And I'm grateful that I have this landing pad for my ideas so I can read them again and again when I'm trying to perfect something.  And come to my gentleness again, with myself, others and the world around me.